Thursday, December 16, 2004

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year...

As I work at a customer service job in the mall, I get to hear all of the great holiday music. It really puts me in the Christmas mood. (Yes, that was sarcasim) The thing is, the more I listen to the music, the more I realize that my sweet, innocent child hood understandstandings of the lyrics have changed. It's as if people are blind to this and I put on those sunglass from "They Live" and I'm the only one that can see. "Oh Dan, calm down. You don't know what you're talking about." I do know and if you take my hand, let me walk you down the path of enlightenment. You think you know, but you have no idea.

"Do They Know It's Christmas," is a pefect example of one of those songs you remember growing up as a child. It was written and sang by an all-star cast for the Band-Aid charity, that helped raise money for Africa. I have heard numerous people tell me that it is this great Christmas song. I don't think people really listen to the lyrics and only like it because it's a catchy tune. I'm not going to go in great detail but I think that this one part is a perfect example of what I'm trying to get across.

And there won't be snow in Africa this Christmas time,
The greatest gift they'll get this year is life,
Where nothing ever grows,
No rain nor river flows,
Do they know it's Christmas time at all?

Ok, so the first thing is that it does snow in Africa. Granted it's not all over the place but there are some great ski resorts in southern Africa so there will be snow in some places for Christmas. The thing that really urks me about this song is that they are asking the question, "Do they know it's Christmas?" and my response is only this...Why would they care? Christmas is a CHRISTIAN holiday. Not everyone in the world are Christian's. Forty percent of the people who live in Africa are Islamic. Yes, I know that it was meant to raise money but do the kids now a days know that? When they hear this they probably think, "Man, that place is fucked up. No presents? I couldn't have that."

Next song is, "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Clause." I know that Santa Claus is the dad but I mean if you think about it, what if you were that kid? "Mommy's cheating on Daddy with jolly ol' St. Nick." In my mind, that just isn't right and not something we should be playing to the young ones. A child shouldn't witness his mother cheating on his dad with anyone, especially Santa. I love getting presents but at the cost of my parents getting divorced...I'm not sure. And when he moved in with us, it would always be in the back of my mind, "Santa's only giving me these gifts so I'd be happy and then mommy would be happy and there's no way that I'd ever call him Daddy number 2."

Ok...one last song...I promise...especially since I wrote this already and for some reason it did not save. Know this one, "Santa Baby"? Yeah, it's pretty much a song about a woman trying to seduce Santa. I mean, she must know that he's married but yet she's still trying to show this man the "other side of the mountain". Come on lady...this is adultry. She must be someone who had a bad childhood. People laugh and think it's a cute song but in reality, she's trying to ruin X-Mas. Is she really that lonely that she wants to want to sleep with a man who is so old he farts dust? I guess so. What's next, giving the Easter Bunny a hand job?

Ok, so I really do love Christmas but there are just some things that bother me. I really am not that bitter...most of the time...but don't push me cause I'm close to the edge. Silver and Gold and Wonderful Christmas Time are great Amercain songs (even though Paul is English). Listen to them, learn them and live it. I promise you that you will have a much happier Christmas. So Happy Holidays to you and to all of your loved ones and the next time you see Santa making out with someone, just remember if it is worth being put on his "naughty" list or not.



2 comments:

The Dana said...

This is hysterical. I hadn't read it but obviously you posted it after our "argument" about Band-Aid. I will have you know, however, that it was not a concert. It was a secret thing that a bunch of big artists in Britain did, put together by the great Bob Geldof, and they recorded it one night, and then sold the 45s (ha! remember those?) to raise money for starving children in Africa. It's the purpose of the song, and the concern for others that make it good song for Christmas. So, that's my $.02 if you care to read it.

Your other two paragraphs were well taken, and while they are fun songs to listen to, I too would like to avoid any infidelity with my parents around the holidays. Makes for a shitty new year.

P.S. In the Santa Baby paragraph you spelled his name Sanata. Is that the spanish santa? Or when Santana gets dressed up for the kiddies? ;)

kagroo said...

Hmmmmmm...so instead of just letting me know that I spelled something wrong or that my information was slightly off...you come to my post and correct me? What the fuck is up with that? Oh yes...I know what this is...I've heard about it...someone is jealous of my BLOG . It's ok. It happens. It's how one tries to make themselves feel better. Don't let it happen again...or my next blog will be about you...and you don't want that.