I love laughing. I love making people laugh. If you are capable of making me laugh out loud then you’ve done a good job. That means I find you funny because I don’t give courtesy laughs. If a kid with cancer came up to me and said that the only way that he would live is if I genuinely laughed at him and if he wasn’t funny, I wouldn’t laugh and he'd die. Not a tear would be shed and I would not go to his funeral. Where am I going with this? Stand-Up comedy. Just because you are labeled as a Stand-Up comic does not mean that I have to find you funny.
I was at a gathering yesterday (I won’t call it a party because parties are considered fun) and by livening it up they put in a dvd of some comic. I thought I’d give it a chance but I knew it was down hill after someone told me that I’d like it because “he says what people think. He’s not ‘P.C.’” To me, when someone has to tell me out loud that I will like it, it means I won’t. “Tastes better then the original,” “You’ll laugh harder then you’ve ever laughed before.” Shit like that is a dead give away that it sucks.
At first I was excited because I thought he was a telepathic comic but what she meant was that nothing was “P.C.” in this man’s eyes. No race, no gender, nothing and I mean NOTHING was off limits. He would say something “shocking,” people would laugh and turn to see if I was laughing. It was as if they wanted to see if I approved and in all honesty I didn’t find it funny. You can only say shit, fuck, bitch so many times before it gets old and lame. Murphy, Prior, Chappelle and David Cross have a gift. It comes off naturally...organic and that’s why I laugh. They tell stories, funny situations. It’s a big build up with a funny conclusion. It’s not, “The reason why Mexicans are poor because they don’t buy Chicklets in bulk.”
I did Stand-Up once at my college and it sucked. I know it's tough, trying to get the love of an audience, wondering why they don't get it. "How can I stand out from the rest? Should I use HA-larious props?" and I came to the reason that I didn't care. I don't care for 99% of Stand-Up comedy. So please just stop. Please don’t waste my time. I don’t care. You aren’t my friend and I don’t care why the chicken crossed the road. So please just Stand-Up and get out of my face...forever.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
17 comments:
Sometimes I struggle with the fact that I never pursued a Stand-Up career. It was Dan's flat rejection of my attempts at comedy that stopped me. You see Dan, you hurt us. Me and Kermit.
I'm glad you are finally getting that my only point in life is to be a mean old bastard. Fucking with the lives of others. Dumb fucks. I love you.
Dave, you could have been a stand up comic. you cracked me up at the spanish conference at the adult ed!! people still talk about that. lawyer or comic? mmmmm tough one.
dan, i agree, it is tough to find stand up comedy funny. I have never, and i mean NEVER laughed at a female comic, all they talk about is how crappy men are or how they are steriotyped. i laugh at about 75% of male comics. i am in the same boat as you.
i have to agree that a lot of stand up comedy is just complete crap. i saw john pinette at caroline's in april and all he did was wisecracks about his own fat ass. i don't think i laughed once. but i have to disagree with q that all female comics are unfunny. janine garofalo, sarah silverman, and tina fey are hilarious. if you haven't checked them out - give 'em a try.
and if you guys think you're so funny:
Carolines on Broadway has a weekly New Talent night. To be considered, please send a VHS tape of your performance (no more than 10 minutes in length) to: New Talent Director, c/o Carolines on Broadway, 1626 Broadway, New York, NY 10019. No phone calls please. Tapes will not be returned. Be sure to include your telephone number.
Q,
I met a guy in college who recognized me from my performance at the Spanish Conference. It kind of socked me that he remembered it.
The best part about the whole day was when Ms. Bowen told me to get off the stage, she had such a glare in her eye that I thought her head would burst. Later she disclosed to me that teachers from the other schools asked her if I was on drugs. Classic!
But I think if you check with Dan, he did not find it particularly funny despite the HA-larious props I had. And even if he did, I don't think I'm sending any tapes to Carolines on Broadway. Sorry Christine.
How could I have found it funny when I wasn't there? Are you kidding me...go and spend a day speaking a language I fucking sucked at? I would must rather go to class and day dream like I did every other day.
Christine,
you are right, Tine Fay, and Jenine G. are pretty funny. I stand corrected. I have never seen there stand up stuff. i haven't seen a ton of stand up women, none i have heard of prior, and they all sucked. but thank you for the corrections, they did not fall on deaf ears(or blind eyes in this instance).
Dave, don't feel bad if dan didn't think it was funny. he doesn't think any thing is funny unless he did or said it.
boo-yah
Q
Ok, for the record, because apparently no one is reading this...I wasn't even at the Adult Ed that day.
Oh yeah, for the record...who was Class Clown motha fuckers. BOO-YA.
I always knew losing that election would come back to haunt me. My wife was her class clown. How can I feel like a man when I tell her I was the second vote getter to Dan.
But Dan, I think you should start capitalizing and throw the distinction on your resume.
How do you think it already looks?
Daniel "Class Clown" McCauley
Dang you dan, bested once agian. class clown. How can i compete with that! All i got was to dance with Sarah Mccord because we were both voted "Most Athletic".
i realize you weren't at the adult ed. my point was, you are a tough critic.
Q
F.U. Quentin.
Dan, weren't you homecoming king too?
NO I wasn't. That was Keith Grafos who also was the one who counted the ballads. Fishy? Hmmm...I don't know. I don't care either cause no one cared about it at Comstock. I did get to miss half-time for football because of that which made me happy.
I'll fucking sue him right now if you want me to.
I'm already preparing the Libel complaint for DOC.
yes... a three way sue. Nate sueing me, I sue keith and Nate, Keith and myself sue you. PERFECT.
Post a Comment