I Love L.A.

In all honesty, who really cares about what Julia Roberts did to get where she is now? That's old fucking news. Here At The Corner Bar, we want fresh faces. We want people who we think are gonna make a difference. Who are gonna make something of their lives. We want it before anyone else gets it.

I interviewed an actress who currently lives in L.A. named Shauna (We won't give her last name to protect her from the scum that show up right before last call). I've known her for over a year now and I've always wondered what it was like to try and be an actor. From my theater experience in college, I've found that there were too many cocky people that claim they are the shit and ending up being mangers at Steak N' Shake. With her, she brought a big plate of honesty to the table. It was something that I know will seperate her from all of the stacked actors in L.A.


ME: What brought you to L.A.?
SHAUNA: I've always wanted to be an actress....on film more than anything else and L.A.'s the place to go, but what made me crack and just do it was the fact that if I didn't chase this crazy dream, I knew I'd regret it for the rest of my life…and being incredibly naive and stubborn didn't hurt.
ME: How has that turned out for you so far?
SHAUNA: A LOT harder than I first anticipated, more because of what I've kept myself from doing as opposed to L.A., yet I blamed my problems on LA
ME: You were blaming L.A. for not finding work?
SHAUNA: No, just for my misery. It was my fault I didn’t find work, I've always known that.
ME: Was there a time when you realized that it was you and not the town that was holding you back?
SHAUNA: When I went home for a month in the summer.
ME: Was it because you separated yourself from the town and realized that you were still upset?
SHAUNA: Yes.
ME: Would you say that the market out there is really competitive?
SHAUNA: Yes, but I've always known that....I just never thought I would be such a pussy about it.
ME: Are you still a pussy?
SHAUNA: Yup.
ME: Is it still holding you back from pursuing your dream?
SHAUNA: Yup.
ME: Well if it's holding you back...why even try?
SHAUNA: Because I have to get over it. I'm confident that I can get over my fears
and I'm trying to better myself.
ME: Have you fallen into the pressure's of the biz; How you look, act, etc?
SHAUNA: No, unfortunately the opposite.
ME: Why would you see that as a bad thing?
SHAUNA: It's not necessarily a bad thing, it’s just that....the harder I try to maybe go towards it, I'm going the opposite.
ME: Do you feel that there is a certain way that you have to look or act to get into the industry?
SHAUNA: Yes.
ME: Would you rather make it in the biz by changing who you are or would you be yourself and not succeed?
SHAUNA: Be myself but sometimes I don’t know who that is anymore.
ME: But what better place to find it in a city where half of the population is looking for the same thing.
SHAUNA: I guess, but if most of the population has no self identity then isn’t that a bad influence for someone with the same problem?
ME: Hey now...I'm the one asking the questions here.
SHAUNA: (laughs)
ME: If you knew what you know now...would you do it all over again?
SHAUNA: I'm afraid that question is not very useful considering the whole point of life is not knowing.
ME: Well if that is your view on it, I'd have to say that you are living your life to the fullest, considering you don't know.
SHAUNA: Yeah, I guess but there’s so much I want and sometimes I don’t feel as though I’m smart enough to get it.
ME: Do you think being smart has some advantages at making it into show business?
SHAUNA: Being smart is everything in show business, contrary to popular belief.
ME: I'd have to say I've worked with some real dumb asses that are in the biz.. I wish someone would tell them that.
SHAUNA: (laughs)
ME: Would you consider what they do in porno's, not the sex part, acting?
SHAUNA: Noooooo!
ME: What do you consider acting?
SHAUNA: The suspension of disbelief.
ME: So when I think that I can have any woman I want...I'm acting?
SHAUNA: (laughs) No it’s not yourself suspending the disbelief, it’s making others suspend it, but porn isn’t acting. You can’t define acting.
ME: So I tricked you?
SHAUNA: (laughs) No.
ME: I think I know what you are saying...it's hard to define acting because there are so many different levels to it that it's hard to pinpoint one thing.
SHAUNA: Right, Joaquin Phoenix is an actor.
ME: Would consider someone like Bob Saget, who can only play one kind of character an actor?
SHAUNA: (laughs) Well he's a comedian. He is talented and he's probably had a moment of acting in his time, but he's not a chameleon which actors, respectable ones at least, need to be.
ME: So no one respects bob Saget?
SHAUNA: No, I respect him but I don’t think many respect him as an ACTOR…comedian, sure.
ME: Ok...I see where you are getting at. Do you think you need an Oscar to be considered a great actor?
SHAUNA: Nooo! Does Johnny Depp have an Oscar? Or Joaquin? Even though he’s getting one.
ME: Would you consider an animal to be a great actor, if they have many layers...like let’s say Lassie?
SHAUNA: (laughs)
ME: Would you say that you are capable of being a chameleon?
SHAUNA: Yes.
ME: So wouldn't you say that since you consider yourself an actor, isn't that something that defines who you are?
SHAUNA: Yes, well being hyper sensitive with my emotions is something that defines who I am. Being an actor is what I do.
ME: Would you say that your emotions are what makes you a good actor?
SHAUNA: Being able to channel them makes you a good actor, well it helps. I can’t tell you what makes someone a good actor.
ME: I know…too hard to define
SHAUNA: Yes, like with writing.
ME: Well good thing we can't define what makes someone a good writer or I'd be in trouble.
SHAUNA: (laughs) But can I tell you one of the things I love about acting growing up? Being an actor was always my dream, how ever, I would think about other jobs that I found interesting; Paleontology, Doctor, Lawyer...but when I really thought about it....all of those other professions are things that I just really wanted to try out, not be committed to day to day...so with acting I can do all of those things. I can still study and learn about the profession and understand it well enough to look like i know what I’m doing, but when the part is over, I can go on to the next one. That’s what I love about acting.



I always find it interesting that people who say they don't know who they are, that say that they aren't that smart, always turn out to be the ones who really know what the fuck is going on. They are the ones who can hold a good conversation, that are the ones that makes the most sense, even when they deny it. I'd like to say that Shauna, and all of you that read, At The Corner Bar (ok, most of you) fit into this category. Each day I want to write because you all inspire me and I thank you for that. It's never easy finding something that makes you happy but when you find it, no matter how much pain it will bring you, no matter how much you doubt it at first, I suggest that you hold on to that and don't let go, no matter how much of a fight it gives you.